You Are Priority No. 1: Practicing with Self-Love

I was always taught that the recipe for a musician's success is practicing for four hours a day. Of course, this mentality is designed with the professional performer in mind. But when I think of all the successful musicians I know, one of the first things I notice is that none of them are only performers.

Every single one of them has a multi-faceted career. They teach, play, guest speak, coach, arrange, compose, judge...the list goes on. When maintaining careers like these, there aren't four hours in a day to practice unless you sacrifice sleep. We all have businesses to run, students to serve, and lives to lead.

So if you often think, "I'm not putting in enough hours a day," I see you.

I challenge you to be gentler on yourself about your practice routine. We all have little voices in our heads telling us how to be better, but it's important to check in with those thoughts and assess if they're serving us helpful motivation or crippling self-doubt.

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As usual, this post is inspired by my own experiences.

For years I felt like I was a bad performance major because I never practiced four hours a day. That's right. Never. Even when I was succeeding in school auditions or competitions, I felt like I wasn't doing enough, like I couldn't keep up. No matter how well I did, I had this lingering guilt; a small voice in my head telling me that I should be practicing more.

So, I tried it.

During my sophomore year, I tried to practice for three hours a day. This seemed reasonable on its own, but I also had rehearsals for band and orchestra twelve hours a week, woodwind quintet two hours a week, and six hours of teaching week.

For a little while, I played with more ease because I was working so much more closely with my instrument. So I thought, "Maybe this is what I have been missing. Maybe this is what it takes to succeed."

After about one month, my arms were constantly aching, and the tendons on the backs of my hands stung when I practiced. My neck was rock hard on one side, and my shoulders felt tired constantly. Then the tingling in my fingers started.**

**I think this is a familiar story for many people. Playing injuries are (unfortunately) not uncommon. If you're experiencing pain while you're playing, please take a break and seek a medical professional's advice!

To alleviate some of the pain and numbness, I switched to a lighter flute and limited any unnecessary playing. I hoped that would be enough to let me body start healing. Then I went to doctors, pursued physical therapy, got bi-weekly massages, and still felt residual pain and numbness for the better part of a year.

To this day, I still have to be careful with how long I practice, and I have come to accept that I'm not built for daily four-hour sessions. For whatever reason, it isn't right for my body, and I'm finally at peace with that. I could have permanently injured myself beyond repair, and I'm grateful that I had the luxury to slow down when that's what my body needed.

In short, I got stuck in this 4 hours a day = success mantra and quickly discovered how wrong it was for me. Once I stopped beating myself up for not "being able to handle it," I had the space to move forward in the way that was best for me.

I know now that I max out at about an hour and a half per day. And honestly, that's more than enough for what I do now. I am finally free of the pressure to practice to a goal post rather than practicing as much as I need to be prepared for my obligations.

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So, here's my message to you:

1. Practice according to what feels right for your physical needs.

Not everyone can practice for 4 hours a day without injuring themselves, so let's agree to acknowledge and accept that.

2. Your practicing habits don't define your worth as a musician or person. 🤯

You are worthy of self-love and compassion regardless of whether you practice two times a week or four hours a day.

3. You can be successful even if you career isn't 100% what you envisioned while you were a student.

Very few people end up doing exactly what they planned, and that's okay.

4. You're intelligent and capable of making decisions to help yourself feel prepared and fulfilled.

Practice as much as you need so you can perform well in rehearsals, lessons, and performances, and let go of the rest. Listen to your body and make decisions about what's best for you.

5. It's difficult to make significant progress in anything if you're always measuring yourself against someone else's metrics and second guessing yourself.

So I'll tell you what I wish someone had told me: approach practicing with compassion for yourself as priority number one.

We are all profoundly unique, so there's simply no way that we could all get to our individual goals by doing the exact same thing. Spend your precious time and energy to set your own routines and boundaries, and remember to leave some wiggle room for the growth and blossoming that's bound to happen.

Be safe, kind, and well,